AMA - You Ask, Bethany Answers!
Hey, loves!
It is that time of the week again – my AMA – which means you ask me all your burning questions, and I try to answer them as best I can. All fun stuff, and sometimes heavy.
Do you have a question for me?
That’s great.
You can drop it into my AMA form HERE and I will get to it.
Now, onto the questions this week …
***
1.Hello! Hoping you are having a fantastic day so far! I would just like to ask considering the amount of books you've put out and continue to, do you struggle in keeping your characters have their own persona and not just like the past characters you have already written? I mean some authors would have books where their heroes/heroines basically act, speak and think like they are the same person.
Hey there.
It’s interesting because if someone cares to read through the reviews of my books – I personally try not to read reviews, they’re really not meant for me anyway – you’ll find this is something that reviewers often mention about my books. And while I can make a statement about my books and say, no, all of my characters are different, I think it ends up being a different situation, and maybe you all trust another reader more than you do the author of the work to give you an honest opinion … but they mention quite frequently that they are surprised at not only how fast I can write a book, but also that I can write so many different characters and couples, but it’s never actually the same thing.
They all have their own quirks, flaws, issues … whatever the case may be. Sometimes, they may use similar language (it is what it is; get it, then, etc) and that’s actually my voice coming through – like that’s how I talk in my every day life.
But in general, these characters are very much their own people. They come to me being unique as it is, and I simply put them down on paper to give them their voices. That’s sort of, what I think anyway, is great about my characters for me personally … is that they don’t make this hard on me. They don’t give me a ton of work to do. They are pretty much what they are from the moment they come to me to the point I put them down on paper.
They’re very real.
And they feel real when you read them.
So no, I have never had trouble making sure that each character you meet feels unique and has their own voice. I don’t write carbon copies of a previous character. I just write them how they come to me – they make take traits from their parents, and they—like in the case of Andino—may take traits from every man or woman who had a part in raising him. He is literally his father, mother, aunts and uncles all rolled into one. He is sensitive to mental health issues, although he doesn’t personally have problems with his own mental health, because of his best friend, and his other cousin who has had to handle that sort of thing.
So yeah, that’s my deal with that sort of thing.
2. Is the line of Marcello boss going to end with Andino? How will that continue? I am wondering after reading Disgrace.
So, I have explained this before in different places, but you’ll also get another look at it in Vow when the topic comes up between Dante and Andino. This is, in a way, a hard line for Dante—this is why he is so pointed on Andino marrying someone who can help him continue on the family legacy, and for Andino … that’s a background thought because he knows one way or the other, the Marcellos are never giving up their strong hold.
Andino believes, mostly, that if their organization does not change with the times, and continues to try and be what it always was, stuck in a different culture with old rules, that they just won’t be able to continue to be as powerful as they are.
Everything changes.
They have to adapt.
But no … John has sons, and Andino has a son. Andino’s son is Half Italian from his father’s side, and can become a boss. John’s sons DNA is a little more muddy because of Jordyn, and his biological grandmother, but as Andino says in Vow, “Who is going to disrespect the dead just to dig up old family history to prove they aren’t what they say they are?” Well, he doesn’t say it like that, but it’s something along those lines, basically.
And he’s not wrong.
So no … the Marcello line doesn’t end with Andino, and it won’t end with his son, or John. You just won’t get to see it because I am not writing further than this legacy generation.
3. Is it common for authors to have personality disorders/mental health issues? Let me expand on this question. I have read several really good series (my opinion) only to have the authors drop off the face of the earth before the last book is finished. Before they disappeared they posted Facebook posts that said something about having to find new editors ect. Then disappear no contact for over a year. What happens to authors that they go silent. Is it writers block or something else I know you can’t answer for these authors personally as you aren’t in their head. However, I know it’s not uncommon for highly creative people to have mental health issues. So back to my questions. Why would a successful author who have written a great series up to the last book go silent? Any insight would be appreciated.
Hi there.
So yeah, I can’t speak on specific people. And I can’t talk on specific circumstances that I personally know about because for one, it’s not appropriate to speculate on people’s mental health. And for two, because it ain’t my damn business.
But yes, it’s very common for highly creative people, and especially artists across many mediums, to have mental health issues. Depression, anxiety … etc. Also, please don’t put personality disorder on the same level as mental health like one encompasses the other entirely because they don’t. Personality disorders are a type of mental health, but so is depression and anxiety, and they’re not even close to the same thing as a personality disorder. Not that one is any worse or better than the other, but it isn’t kind to just put a blanket statement over every single one and every single thing, if you get what I am saying.
As for why an author might need to back away from writing or social media or publishing … maybe because at that point, they have literally hit their limit. Every one who deals with mental health has a limit, and when you reach it, you’re in a bad place. A dark place. A place where your life could be in danger or you are hurting yourself either physically or mentally.
And for someone to just ignore the fact that they’re suffering just to make a post on the internet for their fans or write a book when their body and mind is in pain … seems selfish to expect, in a way. When people get to that point, if it’s a mental health thing they’re dealing with … then they need to do what is best and right for them, always. No excuses. That’s a hard line. No other way to put it.
No one owes anyone an explanation about how they deal or handle their mental health. I have written books while dealing with depression. I have written books that I don’t even remember a lot of the process because I was so deep in that black hole, my mind has blocked it out. I have written for days in which I never said a word to anyone in my house because depression makes me quiet. I have gone days without eating anything more than a can of Rockstar because food is an afterthought when I am in a bout of depression.
But I don’t tell my readers when I’m having one of my moments – because that’s the thing. They are my moments. They are private times for me, and I handle my mental health how I need to handle it, and I’m not inviting anyone into that unless you are a personal friend of mine who I trust to have that sort of information about me.
Do I think I will ever need to back away from my social media presence, or stop writing?
No, writing is my therapy. It is what gets me through depression.
But I am me. I am not another writer. And everyone gets to deal with their problems and issues the way that is appropriate and proper for them. I don’t expect them to be like me – no one else should, either.
My suggestion is if you think an author has backed away for mental health reasons … well, then you just respect that. You respect their choice. Don’t push. Don’t message with things like when is the next book coming? Why haven’t you posted? Where are you? Send them a message like I love your words. Thank you for writing *insert your fave book here*. I hope you’re feeling well.
Words have power.
Words mean things.
And the way you use your words to someone can make all the difference. I hope I’m not coming off as mean here, but rather … well, I’m blunt. This is how I be. So.
That’s all I got.
4. Hi Bethany. First off loved Andino and Haven and can't wait for their next book. This is really random but I have to admit I'm loving Pink the enforcer mentioned in both Duty and Disgrace. Will we ever find out how he got the nickname Pink, such a funny name for an enforcer and it makes me smile anytime I read about him.
LOL, hi there.
So this really isn’t actually random to me because this was a whole damn conversation I had with my editor when we were editing Vow. Because there was a random passing statement in Vow in which Andino calls Pink into his office, and in his head, he explained how Pink got his nickname. BUT … my editor, looking at you, Eli, highlighted it with the note that it seemed random considering every other time Pink had showed up on page, it was specifically mentioned that no one knew how he got his name, and he wouldn’t tell anyone.
And she wasn’t wrong. But I had personally tried to sneak that little bit of info in there for the readers because I knew they had to be wondering how this big ass Marcello enforcer got some cute little nickname like Pink.
Nonetheless, when an editor makes a good point and gives you something to look at … even if you have a million and one excuses for why you want to personally include something in your books, then I highly recommend that you look over their notes, and take it into consideration. Which is exactly what I did here when Eli pointed this bit out to me.
I removed the sentence or two that explained Pink’s nickname, so sorry … you won’t find it in there.
However, I can, of course … tell you now. Pink accidentally washed his standard white shirts with a pair of red boxers and came to work one day with a pink shirt on. And that was how it all started – he’s just the kind of man who rolls with the punches, so he kind of owns his nickname. He doesn’t even care.
Hope this satisfies your curiosity, haha.
5. Did you always plan on John Marcello having Bipolar Disorder? It seems like you planted the seed a little bit in the earlier books but wondering when you fully decided on giving him that diagnosis. Also I want to say how well you wrote John. I have a special place in my heart for him and he’s a character I won’t ever forget❤️ And I loved how you were able to break some of the stereotypical view we have on Bipolar disorder.
Thanks so much for the kind words.
And yes, always. I knew John was going to be bipolar from the time I wrote about Lucian’s mother and father. I knew she was bipolar, and that sometimes, it can be a genetic thing for some disorders. I was terrified to write John for a long time though. I was worried I was going to get too close to the issues I have dealt with in my own life – and I was also worried that in some way, I wouldn’t represent this disorder in the right way, or in a way that wouldn’t hurt someone else who deals with it.
But uh, it turned out okay.
I wasn’t an ignorant … whatever.
And I doubt John will be my last bipolar character, for reference.
Hugs.
Okay, loves. That is all for this week. Until the next!
It is that time of the week again – my AMA – which means you ask me all your burning questions, and I try to answer them as best I can. All fun stuff, and sometimes heavy.
Do you have a question for me?
That’s great.
You can drop it into my AMA form HERE and I will get to it.
Now, onto the questions this week …
***
1.Hello! Hoping you are having a fantastic day so far! I would just like to ask considering the amount of books you've put out and continue to, do you struggle in keeping your characters have their own persona and not just like the past characters you have already written? I mean some authors would have books where their heroes/heroines basically act, speak and think like they are the same person.
Hey there.
It’s interesting because if someone cares to read through the reviews of my books – I personally try not to read reviews, they’re really not meant for me anyway – you’ll find this is something that reviewers often mention about my books. And while I can make a statement about my books and say, no, all of my characters are different, I think it ends up being a different situation, and maybe you all trust another reader more than you do the author of the work to give you an honest opinion … but they mention quite frequently that they are surprised at not only how fast I can write a book, but also that I can write so many different characters and couples, but it’s never actually the same thing.
They all have their own quirks, flaws, issues … whatever the case may be. Sometimes, they may use similar language (it is what it is; get it, then, etc) and that’s actually my voice coming through – like that’s how I talk in my every day life.
But in general, these characters are very much their own people. They come to me being unique as it is, and I simply put them down on paper to give them their voices. That’s sort of, what I think anyway, is great about my characters for me personally … is that they don’t make this hard on me. They don’t give me a ton of work to do. They are pretty much what they are from the moment they come to me to the point I put them down on paper.
They’re very real.
And they feel real when you read them.
So no, I have never had trouble making sure that each character you meet feels unique and has their own voice. I don’t write carbon copies of a previous character. I just write them how they come to me – they make take traits from their parents, and they—like in the case of Andino—may take traits from every man or woman who had a part in raising him. He is literally his father, mother, aunts and uncles all rolled into one. He is sensitive to mental health issues, although he doesn’t personally have problems with his own mental health, because of his best friend, and his other cousin who has had to handle that sort of thing.
So yeah, that’s my deal with that sort of thing.
2. Is the line of Marcello boss going to end with Andino? How will that continue? I am wondering after reading Disgrace.
So, I have explained this before in different places, but you’ll also get another look at it in Vow when the topic comes up between Dante and Andino. This is, in a way, a hard line for Dante—this is why he is so pointed on Andino marrying someone who can help him continue on the family legacy, and for Andino … that’s a background thought because he knows one way or the other, the Marcellos are never giving up their strong hold.
Andino believes, mostly, that if their organization does not change with the times, and continues to try and be what it always was, stuck in a different culture with old rules, that they just won’t be able to continue to be as powerful as they are.
Everything changes.
They have to adapt.
But no … John has sons, and Andino has a son. Andino’s son is Half Italian from his father’s side, and can become a boss. John’s sons DNA is a little more muddy because of Jordyn, and his biological grandmother, but as Andino says in Vow, “Who is going to disrespect the dead just to dig up old family history to prove they aren’t what they say they are?” Well, he doesn’t say it like that, but it’s something along those lines, basically.
And he’s not wrong.
So no … the Marcello line doesn’t end with Andino, and it won’t end with his son, or John. You just won’t get to see it because I am not writing further than this legacy generation.
3. Is it common for authors to have personality disorders/mental health issues? Let me expand on this question. I have read several really good series (my opinion) only to have the authors drop off the face of the earth before the last book is finished. Before they disappeared they posted Facebook posts that said something about having to find new editors ect. Then disappear no contact for over a year. What happens to authors that they go silent. Is it writers block or something else I know you can’t answer for these authors personally as you aren’t in their head. However, I know it’s not uncommon for highly creative people to have mental health issues. So back to my questions. Why would a successful author who have written a great series up to the last book go silent? Any insight would be appreciated.
Hi there.
So yeah, I can’t speak on specific people. And I can’t talk on specific circumstances that I personally know about because for one, it’s not appropriate to speculate on people’s mental health. And for two, because it ain’t my damn business.
But yes, it’s very common for highly creative people, and especially artists across many mediums, to have mental health issues. Depression, anxiety … etc. Also, please don’t put personality disorder on the same level as mental health like one encompasses the other entirely because they don’t. Personality disorders are a type of mental health, but so is depression and anxiety, and they’re not even close to the same thing as a personality disorder. Not that one is any worse or better than the other, but it isn’t kind to just put a blanket statement over every single one and every single thing, if you get what I am saying.
As for why an author might need to back away from writing or social media or publishing … maybe because at that point, they have literally hit their limit. Every one who deals with mental health has a limit, and when you reach it, you’re in a bad place. A dark place. A place where your life could be in danger or you are hurting yourself either physically or mentally.
And for someone to just ignore the fact that they’re suffering just to make a post on the internet for their fans or write a book when their body and mind is in pain … seems selfish to expect, in a way. When people get to that point, if it’s a mental health thing they’re dealing with … then they need to do what is best and right for them, always. No excuses. That’s a hard line. No other way to put it.
No one owes anyone an explanation about how they deal or handle their mental health. I have written books while dealing with depression. I have written books that I don’t even remember a lot of the process because I was so deep in that black hole, my mind has blocked it out. I have written for days in which I never said a word to anyone in my house because depression makes me quiet. I have gone days without eating anything more than a can of Rockstar because food is an afterthought when I am in a bout of depression.
But I don’t tell my readers when I’m having one of my moments – because that’s the thing. They are my moments. They are private times for me, and I handle my mental health how I need to handle it, and I’m not inviting anyone into that unless you are a personal friend of mine who I trust to have that sort of information about me.
Do I think I will ever need to back away from my social media presence, or stop writing?
No, writing is my therapy. It is what gets me through depression.
But I am me. I am not another writer. And everyone gets to deal with their problems and issues the way that is appropriate and proper for them. I don’t expect them to be like me – no one else should, either.
My suggestion is if you think an author has backed away for mental health reasons … well, then you just respect that. You respect their choice. Don’t push. Don’t message with things like when is the next book coming? Why haven’t you posted? Where are you? Send them a message like I love your words. Thank you for writing *insert your fave book here*. I hope you’re feeling well.
Words have power.
Words mean things.
And the way you use your words to someone can make all the difference. I hope I’m not coming off as mean here, but rather … well, I’m blunt. This is how I be. So.
That’s all I got.
4. Hi Bethany. First off loved Andino and Haven and can't wait for their next book. This is really random but I have to admit I'm loving Pink the enforcer mentioned in both Duty and Disgrace. Will we ever find out how he got the nickname Pink, such a funny name for an enforcer and it makes me smile anytime I read about him.
LOL, hi there.
So this really isn’t actually random to me because this was a whole damn conversation I had with my editor when we were editing Vow. Because there was a random passing statement in Vow in which Andino calls Pink into his office, and in his head, he explained how Pink got his nickname. BUT … my editor, looking at you, Eli, highlighted it with the note that it seemed random considering every other time Pink had showed up on page, it was specifically mentioned that no one knew how he got his name, and he wouldn’t tell anyone.
And she wasn’t wrong. But I had personally tried to sneak that little bit of info in there for the readers because I knew they had to be wondering how this big ass Marcello enforcer got some cute little nickname like Pink.
Nonetheless, when an editor makes a good point and gives you something to look at … even if you have a million and one excuses for why you want to personally include something in your books, then I highly recommend that you look over their notes, and take it into consideration. Which is exactly what I did here when Eli pointed this bit out to me.
I removed the sentence or two that explained Pink’s nickname, so sorry … you won’t find it in there.
However, I can, of course … tell you now. Pink accidentally washed his standard white shirts with a pair of red boxers and came to work one day with a pink shirt on. And that was how it all started – he’s just the kind of man who rolls with the punches, so he kind of owns his nickname. He doesn’t even care.
Hope this satisfies your curiosity, haha.
5. Did you always plan on John Marcello having Bipolar Disorder? It seems like you planted the seed a little bit in the earlier books but wondering when you fully decided on giving him that diagnosis. Also I want to say how well you wrote John. I have a special place in my heart for him and he’s a character I won’t ever forget❤️ And I loved how you were able to break some of the stereotypical view we have on Bipolar disorder.
Thanks so much for the kind words.
And yes, always. I knew John was going to be bipolar from the time I wrote about Lucian’s mother and father. I knew she was bipolar, and that sometimes, it can be a genetic thing for some disorders. I was terrified to write John for a long time though. I was worried I was going to get too close to the issues I have dealt with in my own life – and I was also worried that in some way, I wouldn’t represent this disorder in the right way, or in a way that wouldn’t hurt someone else who deals with it.
But uh, it turned out okay.
I wasn’t an ignorant … whatever.
And I doubt John will be my last bipolar character, for reference.
Hugs.
Okay, loves. That is all for this week. Until the next!
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